Wednesday, February 29, 2012

My Mommy Smile

Sometimes at night, my hand somewhat subconsciously moves down my belly to rub the scar that sits right where a bikini waistline would fall. That scar is what Marc refers to as my “smile.” And each time, I think about how lucky I am that the modern technology exists that makes my Mommy Smile possible.

It’s beyond the technology of c-sections…it’s the more than that.

It’s the technology that monitored the unborn baby to make sure she was healthy and not in distress for that wonderfully long 34 hours.

It’s the technology that was able to quickly—with a little IV fluid and motrin—to end the slight climb to potential distress of my unborn baby mid-labor.

It IS the technology that allows for C-section delivery.

Yet with all this technology, and with all this monitoring, no one knew what really awaited (if you like to read about female reproductive conditions, click here, if not, just know…we were lucky).

2011-11-01 17.06.18

(the one and only picture of munchkin and I from the day Autumn was born. And it’s blurry…And I’m probably drugged…)

My Mommy Smile reminds me how lucky I am to have myself a big girl…a big girl who was facing posterior and would not be turned…a big girl facing posterior who wouldn’t allow Mother Nature (and her mother) to do things the natural way. I like to say she was holding on to my rib cage with her toes (I think she knew something all the big grown ups didn’t).

My Mommy Smile reminds me how lucky we are for medicines to stop bleeding, bring down high fevers and stop severe body shaking (if you’ve experienced that, you know how awfully fun that is).

My Mommy Smile reminds me I’m lucky to be a mommy and a wife, that I’m not a statistic. It tells me I’m alive (FYI since I don’t like to talk about this part…I most likely will not mention it again, on my blog or in person. And I’m more than cool with you all ignoring it too). My baby is alive. We’re together, and we’re all a family.

My Mommy Smile reminds me how lucky I am to have the option of a brother or sister for Autumn in the future—which makes this Mommy smile (ha ha get that…?) because I’m a pretty big fan of siblings (Gotta love siblings--to get the full picture, read the comments too). I’m not sure how I would’ve handled not being able to just have one (also, we HAVE to have more than one, because if it wasn’t meant to be I wouldn’t be able to. Right, Marc? Winking smile).

It’s nice to be reminded. Sometimes we just have those days. We go to bed so tired, so sick, so frustrated…and then the belly itches, and I rub my Mommy Smile…and I am thankful. I may still be tired, sick and frustrated, but I know we can get past it. We’ll wake up the next day, and we’ll keep trudging…


…my Mommy Smile and me.               

1 comment:

ebana said...

I am really happy for you. I know how much you have wanted this little bundle:)